


Part 1: Fangirl-in-Training

by Cumberbeau



Series: Sherlock Holmes and John Watson: Everyday Life [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: John is away, M/M, Sherlock is bored, So Little Time, Twitter, all in good fun, friends - Freeform, it's all through DMs, my headcannon of John and Sherlock can get a bit odd sometimes, so many ideas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-04
Updated: 2013-10-04
Packaged: 2017-12-28 09:58:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/990676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cumberbeau/pseuds/Cumberbeau
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which, John introduces Sherlock to twitter in an attempt to keep him distracted and relatively calm while John is away from 221B, and they have a conversation over DMs.</p><p>CAN BE READ AS A STAND-ALONE<br/>[I should add that this is the only one written like this, with the twitter. There won't be another one; so if you don't like it, I suggest reading Part 2, as it is written in a normal way.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Part 1: Fangirl-in-Training

**Author's Note:**

> I know nothing about Demi Lovato; that was suggested by an acquaintance of mine, so I really did have to search for the information.  
> This conversation is based on one that actually happened between that acquaintance and I; our conversations often turn to roleplay. She structured much of John's dialogue, so he's a bit OOC.  
> Do excuse it if it isn't to your liking; Part 2 in this "Everyday Life" bit is written entirely by me, so hopefully it will better satisfy.

Are you there? -SH

Sherlock, is that you?? -JW

Indeed. -SH

Why did you change your username? -JW

I did not appreciate the name @Sulky3YearOld so I changed it. Why, couldn't you find me? -SH

No, actually, which is why I sent you a slightly panicked text. And I found you from searching your name. When I saw that tweet about saliva and coagulation, I knew it was you -JW

I direct messaged you, did you not see it? -SH

No, I did not, not until now. -JW

Ah. I see. -SH

Sherlock... -JW

Yes, John? -SH

What are you tweeting. -JW

I am simply informing them of the dangers of pollen and fingerprints. Why? -SH

You do realize that the only people following you are fangirls, right? -JW

Yes. -SH

I don't think they'd be interested in that type of thing; you'll lose followers. -JW

What am I supposed to tweet about, then? -SH

I don't know, be more light-hearted! -JW

... -SH

Okay maybe not. But at least try to blend in with them. -JW

How. -SH

Well, you could start by typing like them. -JW

Are you implying that I should bring out the emoticons? -SH

Sort of, yes. -JW

Why? I do not deem them necessary to this social networking site. -SH

Just do it, Sherlock. -JW

Alright, since it will make you happy, John. -SH

...I'm waiting. -JW

Sherlock? -JW

Where'd you go? -JW

LOL :* :* :) -SH

How'd I do, John? -SH

...very good. You looked that up, didn't you. -JW

That is irrelevant. -SH

You did look it up. -JW

Where are you now, John? -SH

See, you looked it up! -JW

Irrelevant. -SH

Alright, alright, have it your way. I'm still on the train. -JW

To that house, correct? -SH

Yes, I knew William before the war, and he wanted to catch up a bit. -JW

Hmm. -SH

I won't be gone long, Sherlock, you can manage without me. -JW

Of course I can. What are you implying. -SH

Nothing, nothing. -JW

John I responded to your text. -SH

John. -SH

JOHN WHERE DID YOU GO -sh

Excuse the caps lock, that was a mistake. -SH

I was answering the text you sent me! -JW

Very good. You going to have a kip on their couch? -SH

No, actually, I'll be sleeping in the bed of the brother who's in Panama at the moment. -JW

That is good then, you won't get a sore back. Panama? Why? -SH

He's on a mission trip. -JW

I see. Is the house far from the train? -SH

No, it's conveniently close, which is good. It isn't a long walk, but he'll come to get me with a car, just in case. -JW

Is he concerned about you walking for some reason? -SH

No, I think he just wants to be courteous since he hasn't seen me for awhile. -JW

That is good, then. Caring often provides no advantages. -SH

Though in this case, I have the upper hand, of sorts. -JW

Good, good! You have learned well! -SH

I have learned from the best. -JW

Quite. Indeed. Yes. -SH

I believe this is what people type when they are expressing gratitude? -SH

Wait a moment. -SH

:) ty -SH

Yes, you are learning, I believe you will be able to blend into the outside world quite well. -JW

Good, good, this will come in handy. -SH

:D -SH

Even better! I think that normal people shall relate to you if you keep it up, well done. -JW

It will be quite interesting to see how they will view me with their funny little minds. -SH

They will probably consider you less than intelligent, considering much of their vocabulary is limited to fangirling. -JW

Less than intelligent is alright, seeing as that is what they are, and I must try to behave like them. Correct? -SH

Indeed, you must do your best to behave like that if you are to be believed. -JW

Also, "fangirling". I am slightly familiar with the term, do explain more? -SH

"Fangirling": the term used when females of any age find a celebrity attractive and proceed to both ogle them and scream at the same time. -JW

Understood; I shall work on this. Also; I should be attracted to a celebrity; sexually, physically, or mentally? -SH

You should be attracted to their personality somewhat, but mostly physically/sexually, constantly saying how "cute" or "hot" they are. -JW

Ah, I see. Male or female? -SH

Being male yourself, it would be easier to pull off such an act toward the female species. -JW

Hm, yes, that makes sense. Females aren't generally my area of expertise. Suggestions, John, since you are well versed in these matters? -SH

I would start by focusing on how well a female celebrity sings, or something of that sort. Once you can successfully ramble on for hours about their talent, move on to a different area, such as their eyes or figure. It may be uncomfortable, but I believe you can pull it off convincingly. -JW

...HOURS, John? Do they honestly consume their time that way? No wonder they're all so dreadfully boring... Alright, give me a celebrity. -SH

Indeed, hours. And I would suggest Demi Lovato for a start, if you are really going through with this. -JW

There is no challenge that I won't undertake. I appreciate your faith in me. -SH

Sherlock? -JW

Hey. -JW

Full name: Demetria Devonne Lovato. Birthday: August 20, 1992. Born in New Mexico, raised in Texas. Heritage: Mexican, Italian, Irish, English. Star sign: Leo. Height: 5 feet 3.5 inches, or 161 centimetres. Weight: 143 pounds, or 65 kilogrammes. Measurements: 34-28-36 inches, or 86-71-91.5 centimetres. Bra size: 34B. Shoe size: 7 American, 4.5 British. -SH

...your capability continues to astound me. -JW

Is this sufficient? -SH

Yes, I think you are well equipped to fangirl over this person. -JW

Alright, where should I test these "fangirl" skills? -SH

Simply on twitter. There are many people who will accept you if you act correctly, and you can learn more fangirling techniques by watching them. A few of your followers are having a conversation, they are discussing a gathering of girls, and how they wish you would join them. Go have a chat. -JW

A gathering of females; do they trust that they'll be safe around me? Of course they would be, I would never touch them, but that is very interesting. Something to ponder. -SH

What I just tweeted, was it good? Am I blending in well? -SH

...Instead of "that sounds delightful", I would suggest typing "WHOA I CAN'T WAIT AS;DLFHADS;LGKHASLDF"; it might work. They will trust you if you appear as one of them. -JW

Ah. -SH

They use many capitals, John, is that normal? -SH

Am I supposed to do that? -SH

Yes, it would be wise to use them. -JW

I see. Thank you, John. -SH

I have great confidence in your abilities. -JW

...Sherlock -JW

Yes? -SH

That last tweet was no good. -JW

Really? Which one? -SH

The one about your work. -JW

Ah, I see. It is true though, you know I consider myself married to my work. -SH

Yes but don't tweet that. Practice your fangirling. -JW

...Sherlock. -JW

Is that a photo of me that you just tweeted? -JW

SHERLOCK -JW

Yes John? -SH

DON'T FANGIRL OVER ME -JW

But John you told me to "fangirl" over someone attractive, and you aren't revolting. Plus you're easy to put up with. -SH

I MIGHT BE EASY TO PUT UP WITH, BUT YOU SHOULDN'T DO THAT -JW

Although I suppose I am flattered that you don't think I'm ugly, so thank you, I guess? -JW

On the contrary, who better to fangirl over than my blogger? -SH

The people you are talking to will probably find it odd if you fangirl over me rather than a well-known celebrity... -JW

And I'm not gay. -JW

I never said you were, John. -SH

... -JW

What is it, John? -SH

Nothing. Go fangirl over a celebrity. -JW

Alright, you have a valid point involving celebrities. -SH

Train's nearly there, Sherlock, I have to go now. -JW

Have a fantastic time at your colleague's house, John, and I shall see you soon, don't get kidnapped by Mycroft. -SH

Shut up. I'll talk to you tomorrow, good luck amongst the fangirls. -JW

Thank you John, your advice has been a tremendous help. Farewell. -SH

:* <3 ILYSM -SH

SHERLOCK FOR GOD'S SAKE -JW

What? -SH

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU JUST TYPED? -JW

...I saw a girl saying that to another girl who was leaving. -SH

YOU JUST TYPED A KISS, A HEART, AND SAID "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH" -JW

Ah. That makes sense, I see, yes based on the context... -SH

SHERLOCK -JW

What, John. -SH

Oh never mind! -JW

heh :] -SH

...maybe this was a bad idea. -JW

Goodbye John :] -SH


End file.
